The budget crisis in California may be old news, but the Los Rios Community College District is just beginning to bite the bullet. Adjunct faculty and students will bear the weight of most of the fiscal reductions facing the district.
“Los Rios serves as a template for national community college districts,” David Reese said, political science professor at Folsom Lake College, “We are the top managed, fiscally conservative district in the entire country. The last three years we’ve been able to delay the pain that other community colleges around that state have been suffering. They’ve already gone through this.”
The Chancellor of Los Rios sent an update last week to all faculty and staff, showing the net reductions to Los Rios, and how it will particularly affect them. The Governor’s budget reduces community college funding by $290 million with an additional $250-$500 million cut. This means that Los Rios will reduce faculty, classified and management positions, increase health care payments, implement salary rollbacks and make it even harder for students to get classes.
“When times are good we all benefit, when times are bad we all suffer,” Reese said. “The classified staff, the faculty, the staff, the administration – initially we were told there was a 1% cut to all our salaries. Now that the budget hasn’t passed, it means a 3% cut, and an increase in the cost of health insurance and lowered living allowance.”
Reese said that he couldn’t just measure his salary numbers but what he called “the take-home salary.”
“When you don’t get the raise you expected, that counts as a reduction. When you have to pay for things you didn’t use to have to pay for, counts as a reduction. That means we are facing a 10 to 12 percent pay cut for all of us here at the college. That, to me, is not a way to repair California economy,” Reese said.
But the majority of the burden will be felt by adjunct faculty and students.
According to the Chancellor’s update, none of the scenarios for handling the budget crisis will affect regular or tenure employees, but there will be less need to spend the money on adjunct faculty.
“These reductions will be felt by many valuable adjunct employees who, in some cases, have been with us for years,” wrote the Chancellor, in his update.
Los Rios employs 1,300 adjunct faculty right now. They are paid full parity, which means the same hour-for-hour classroom instruction rates, and they are also eligible for benefits, said Suzie Williams, the communication and research advisor for Los Rios.
“One of the reason we are so fiscally conservative, is because we are a good family,” Reese said. “We work well together. Laying off adjunct professors means we are saying goodbye to friends, family and people that are every bit as much of the college as we are.”
Williams said that students and faculty are all understanding and just appreciate that the district is communicating and doing the best they can, with the money they have.
“Overall the situation sucks,” Cody Pritchard said, Folsom Lake College student. “But it is just the way things are going these days and we have to learn to adapt to the changes and make it work. Eventually things will get better and the budget will start to go up. Hopefully.”
The Chancellor’s update included the “unfortunate reductions we will be forced to make in class offerings” which will impact students. However, the Chancellor indicated it could not find a solution providing greater protection for students.
“We cannot allow our over-cap enrollment to increase without jeopardizing our long-term financial health,” the update said.
With budget cuts across all college districts, the demand for community college is going up, without there being an ability to satisfy that demand.
“Because of the enrollment caps going on at the CSUS and UC systems, there is more of a demand for our classes, classes are all full and the quality of students are increasing because seats are much more valuable and everyone is trying to get in them,” Reese said. “But cutting sections and looking to balance budgets on the back of students is not right. For some reason America believes that the only way you can dig yourself out of an economic malaise is by cutting education.”
The Chancellor plans to meet with faculty and staff, the Board of Trustees and the Districtwide Budget Committee to start up additional conversation about the options Los Rios has in balancing their budget with reduced funding.
“When the pain gets bad enough, the people of California will speak loud and clear to say that is not what they wanted,” Reese said. “We are going to have a lot of pain, but that will make us address the festering problems that are lingering in our state and our budget.”
Sunday, April 3, 2011
Folsom's New Stages
Fans of live theater, concerts and art shows are gifted with the brand new 80,000-square-foot art facility just 25 miles outside of Sacramento’s art hub. Three Stages is just the beginning of an entirely new focus on the arts for Folsom Lake College.
“Three Stages has already changed the cultural life of the campus and of Folsom dramatically,” said David Webb, marketing consultant for Three Stages. “With national touring companies like "A Chorus Line,” Joffrey Ballet and iconic figures like Gloria Steinem coming onto campus, suddenly the Highway 50 corridor has a new state-of-the-art facility in which people can see not only national and international artists, but the best of the region's performing arts groups like the Sacramento Ballet.”
Three Stages hosts three performing arts venues, at art gallery, an enormous recording studio with the ability to hold an entire orchestra and extensive classroom and rehearsal space.
“Folsom Lake College started out as a very basic school, just some trailers on a lot,” said president of the board of trustees, Terry Cochran. “We’ve grown into a full-fledged community college offering everything there is to offer and it is a magnificent addition to the community.”
The facility’s detailed design, high quality sound and décor make Three Stages “the jewel in the crown of the district,” Webb said.
“This is the one place in the area you can go and find out about all regional and national arts,” said Dave Pier, executive director of Three Stages. “Everyone is under one roof and they can just focus on what they do best: art.”
But the $50 million project is facing a dilemma: how to operate within its resources without spending money on hiring more faculty or programs.
At this point the only thing detaining Three Stages from exercising its full potential is the budget.
“With the awful budget situation there was a pushback and we were not able to add all the stuff we envisioned adding,” said David Hamilton, dean of visual and performing arts at Folsom Lake College. “Its sad that we can’t offer a third of what we would like to. But each program is focusing on what they can do now.”
The plan is to add two to three more full time staff and programs that will use the Three Stages facility to offer degrees and certificates in music, theater and technical stage managing and design, Hamilton said.
“This is the worst budget situation for California Community Colleges in the history of the state,” Hamilton said. “But the district is committed to premier programs in the arts. We just won’t have growth for awhile and opportunities outside the current instruction we are able to offer.”
Cochran believes that the Los Rios Community College district is in a better financial state than other community colleges in California because of smart financing and no contemplation of any lay-offs.
“Most of the funding for this center was from private individuals and bond issues that people voted on, hardly anything from the state,” Cochran said.
The important part is that students and faculty are moving into the specifically designed spaces and using them to increase their ability to teach and perform art, Hamilton said.
“There is nothing like this center anywhere in the valley,” Hamilton said. “The idea is to have the best instruction and also to bring in art from the community and professional art as well. It is a huge asset to this area. I can already hear people saying, ‘It’s just up the hill’ or ‘It’s just down the hill,’ because it is so close to all of us.”
Already, Three Stages has contracted local performing artists like El Dorado Musical Theater to partner with the facility and use it as a contracted performance venue.
“Folsom had always shown an interest in the arts, but the level of talent and quality of shows the theater attracts will make Folsom a destination for performing arts,” said Wade Sherman, executive producer for El Dorado Musical Theater. “A world class venue like Three Stages will lead to more exposure for all the major local groups. Over time, I think Folsom Lake College will develop curriculum worthy of the facility as well.”
Even in light of the budget crisis, Webb wants everyone to know that Three Stages has avant-garde programs and spaces to offer for students, for the community and for the region.
“Five years from now, the community won't know how they ever lived without Three Stages,” he said.
“Three Stages has already changed the cultural life of the campus and of Folsom dramatically,” said David Webb, marketing consultant for Three Stages. “With national touring companies like "A Chorus Line,” Joffrey Ballet and iconic figures like Gloria Steinem coming onto campus, suddenly the Highway 50 corridor has a new state-of-the-art facility in which people can see not only national and international artists, but the best of the region's performing arts groups like the Sacramento Ballet.”
Three Stages hosts three performing arts venues, at art gallery, an enormous recording studio with the ability to hold an entire orchestra and extensive classroom and rehearsal space.
“Folsom Lake College started out as a very basic school, just some trailers on a lot,” said president of the board of trustees, Terry Cochran. “We’ve grown into a full-fledged community college offering everything there is to offer and it is a magnificent addition to the community.”
The facility’s detailed design, high quality sound and décor make Three Stages “the jewel in the crown of the district,” Webb said.
“This is the one place in the area you can go and find out about all regional and national arts,” said Dave Pier, executive director of Three Stages. “Everyone is under one roof and they can just focus on what they do best: art.”
But the $50 million project is facing a dilemma: how to operate within its resources without spending money on hiring more faculty or programs.
At this point the only thing detaining Three Stages from exercising its full potential is the budget.
“With the awful budget situation there was a pushback and we were not able to add all the stuff we envisioned adding,” said David Hamilton, dean of visual and performing arts at Folsom Lake College. “Its sad that we can’t offer a third of what we would like to. But each program is focusing on what they can do now.”
The plan is to add two to three more full time staff and programs that will use the Three Stages facility to offer degrees and certificates in music, theater and technical stage managing and design, Hamilton said.
“This is the worst budget situation for California Community Colleges in the history of the state,” Hamilton said. “But the district is committed to premier programs in the arts. We just won’t have growth for awhile and opportunities outside the current instruction we are able to offer.”
Cochran believes that the Los Rios Community College district is in a better financial state than other community colleges in California because of smart financing and no contemplation of any lay-offs.
“Most of the funding for this center was from private individuals and bond issues that people voted on, hardly anything from the state,” Cochran said.
The important part is that students and faculty are moving into the specifically designed spaces and using them to increase their ability to teach and perform art, Hamilton said.
“There is nothing like this center anywhere in the valley,” Hamilton said. “The idea is to have the best instruction and also to bring in art from the community and professional art as well. It is a huge asset to this area. I can already hear people saying, ‘It’s just up the hill’ or ‘It’s just down the hill,’ because it is so close to all of us.”
Already, Three Stages has contracted local performing artists like El Dorado Musical Theater to partner with the facility and use it as a contracted performance venue.
“Folsom had always shown an interest in the arts, but the level of talent and quality of shows the theater attracts will make Folsom a destination for performing arts,” said Wade Sherman, executive producer for El Dorado Musical Theater. “A world class venue like Three Stages will lead to more exposure for all the major local groups. Over time, I think Folsom Lake College will develop curriculum worthy of the facility as well.”
Even in light of the budget crisis, Webb wants everyone to know that Three Stages has avant-garde programs and spaces to offer for students, for the community and for the region.
“Five years from now, the community won't know how they ever lived without Three Stages,” he said.
College Diet
As students return for another semester at community college, they might be surprised by the lack of fried and fatty foods in the cafeteria. Folsom Lake College is changing its diet.
Just one semester ago, the cafeteria was a quarter of the size and offered greasy pizza and a few burger or sandwich choices. Now, eating on campus is a whole new experience.
Instead of pre-made pizza, students can choose their own toppings. Instead of hamburgers, students are offered a choice of fresh meats and vegetables sautéed right in front of them. And don’t forget the lettuce wraps offered in the sandwich section. Next semester the dessert section gets the chopping block. Goodbye chocolate cake and hello fruit smoothies.
Folsom Lake College has grown in the last four years from a few mobile units to over 6 buildings. To match this expansion, the old kitchen needed to serve over 8,000 students. A remodel and addition helped to create the look of an executive made-for-order dining experience, complete with new equipment, a sauté section and a professional chef.
“The most popular food for college students is fried food. You can’t stop young people from eating burgers,” Steve Sims said, the new chef manager at Folsom Lake College “It’s my personal charter to try to make all the food nice and fresh and bring in different food concepts like Mediterranean and Italian.”
Sims is the last building block in the complete shift in the cafeteria. Sims brings his culinary training and past experiences as a head chef at a few hotels and restaurants to manage the new kitchen facility, create recipes, train cooks and provide nutritional information for students. Every week one section of the cafeteria offers a certain genre of food, always with a vegetarian and low-fat option. Next week is Mexican, per request of students.
“I think Sims has tapped into a lot of the comments that have been cruising around campus since it opened,” Jessica Hodge said, nutrition professor at Folsom Lake College. “He makes the food fresh, he makes it reasonable and he makes it flexible. It takes a little longer to get things because it is labor intensive work, but the speed at which they produce such healthy choices is excellent.”
Hodge said that she would never eat anything offered at the cafeteria before. Now everything has changed. She will meet colleagues or students there to share a soy-protein lettuce wrap or a fruit bowl.
“This is basically a brand new facility,” Sims said. “And I want to offer all fresh ingredients with a vegetarian, a low-fat and a low-sodium option offered at each of our stations. It’s all about minimizing fats and having different healthy options.”
Sims began offering soy-protein lettuce wraps just last week, and already he said they have become wildly popular. But even the more typical college student fare has changed form.
“Did you take a look at the pizzas? They are unbelievable!” Hodge said. “The pizza guy was so cute. When I was there he was asking me to take one, to take a sample. He was so proud of those pizzas. And he should be. They are healthier and they have a beautiful way of presenting it.”
Sim’s plan is to take what remains of the fatty foods that college students crave and offer a healthier way to eat them. Pizza was the first step, offering fresh vegetables for toppings and minimizing grease.
Before the change, the school was not set up with the necessary equipment to provide innovative dishes, Hodge said. The sauté is Hodge’s favorite piece of equipment. She hopes that she can use it as a part of the cooking lessons in her nutrition classes on campus.
Students are appreciating this innovation with the larger amount of food options and the nutritional value.
“I’m not really a nutritionally sane guy, but I can still taste the difference,” said Bradley King, 31-year-old student. “I eat here every Tuesday and Thursday and for the record, this breakfast burrito is one of the best I’ve had.”
Despite the variety of choices and the increase in healthiness, the prices at the cafeteria have remained reasonable, King said.
There has been no significant increase in the price for food on campus since the cafeteria’s re-birth. But for the typical cash-poor college student, 22-year-old Mike Tripp, reasonable isn’t quite good enough.
“Eating is expensive and when you have the time it’s much less expensive to go off campus with all the choices that we have in Folsom,” Tripp said. “But with this new cafeteria I guess it would be hard to justify leaving campus if the prices were a bit more reasonable.”
Tripp and his friend, T.J. Santoro, both appreciated Folsom Lake College’s additions to the cafeteria.
“It feels like a real school now, and I think that’s the best part,” Santoro said.
Hodge shares Santoro’s excitement and hopes that this means continued changes and growth for Folsom Lake College. She knows how long change takes and was a front-runner in encouraging it.
“Three years ago they started a food service committee of faculty, staff, students and administration. We met and discussed what issues there were, what problems there were and how we could make the food better,” Hodge said. “The committee brought awareness and the thought, ‘Wait a minute, things aren’t good here. We need to change it somehow to make it more exceptional – to make it better.’”
Sims said that the entire Los Rios district of schools is increasing their nutritional efforts.
“This campus is very small, but we are doing as much as anyone else,” Sims said. “And I am looking for ways to increase the healthy options, especially for grab-and-go customers. We want to be really healthy and hope to keep developing that aspect of the cafeteria for Folsom Lake College.”
Just one semester ago, the cafeteria was a quarter of the size and offered greasy pizza and a few burger or sandwich choices. Now, eating on campus is a whole new experience.
Instead of pre-made pizza, students can choose their own toppings. Instead of hamburgers, students are offered a choice of fresh meats and vegetables sautéed right in front of them. And don’t forget the lettuce wraps offered in the sandwich section. Next semester the dessert section gets the chopping block. Goodbye chocolate cake and hello fruit smoothies.
Folsom Lake College has grown in the last four years from a few mobile units to over 6 buildings. To match this expansion, the old kitchen needed to serve over 8,000 students. A remodel and addition helped to create the look of an executive made-for-order dining experience, complete with new equipment, a sauté section and a professional chef.
“The most popular food for college students is fried food. You can’t stop young people from eating burgers,” Steve Sims said, the new chef manager at Folsom Lake College “It’s my personal charter to try to make all the food nice and fresh and bring in different food concepts like Mediterranean and Italian.”
Sims is the last building block in the complete shift in the cafeteria. Sims brings his culinary training and past experiences as a head chef at a few hotels and restaurants to manage the new kitchen facility, create recipes, train cooks and provide nutritional information for students. Every week one section of the cafeteria offers a certain genre of food, always with a vegetarian and low-fat option. Next week is Mexican, per request of students.
“I think Sims has tapped into a lot of the comments that have been cruising around campus since it opened,” Jessica Hodge said, nutrition professor at Folsom Lake College. “He makes the food fresh, he makes it reasonable and he makes it flexible. It takes a little longer to get things because it is labor intensive work, but the speed at which they produce such healthy choices is excellent.”
Hodge said that she would never eat anything offered at the cafeteria before. Now everything has changed. She will meet colleagues or students there to share a soy-protein lettuce wrap or a fruit bowl.
“This is basically a brand new facility,” Sims said. “And I want to offer all fresh ingredients with a vegetarian, a low-fat and a low-sodium option offered at each of our stations. It’s all about minimizing fats and having different healthy options.”
Sims began offering soy-protein lettuce wraps just last week, and already he said they have become wildly popular. But even the more typical college student fare has changed form.
“Did you take a look at the pizzas? They are unbelievable!” Hodge said. “The pizza guy was so cute. When I was there he was asking me to take one, to take a sample. He was so proud of those pizzas. And he should be. They are healthier and they have a beautiful way of presenting it.”
Sim’s plan is to take what remains of the fatty foods that college students crave and offer a healthier way to eat them. Pizza was the first step, offering fresh vegetables for toppings and minimizing grease.
Before the change, the school was not set up with the necessary equipment to provide innovative dishes, Hodge said. The sauté is Hodge’s favorite piece of equipment. She hopes that she can use it as a part of the cooking lessons in her nutrition classes on campus.
Students are appreciating this innovation with the larger amount of food options and the nutritional value.
“I’m not really a nutritionally sane guy, but I can still taste the difference,” said Bradley King, 31-year-old student. “I eat here every Tuesday and Thursday and for the record, this breakfast burrito is one of the best I’ve had.”
Despite the variety of choices and the increase in healthiness, the prices at the cafeteria have remained reasonable, King said.
There has been no significant increase in the price for food on campus since the cafeteria’s re-birth. But for the typical cash-poor college student, 22-year-old Mike Tripp, reasonable isn’t quite good enough.
“Eating is expensive and when you have the time it’s much less expensive to go off campus with all the choices that we have in Folsom,” Tripp said. “But with this new cafeteria I guess it would be hard to justify leaving campus if the prices were a bit more reasonable.”
Tripp and his friend, T.J. Santoro, both appreciated Folsom Lake College’s additions to the cafeteria.
“It feels like a real school now, and I think that’s the best part,” Santoro said.
Hodge shares Santoro’s excitement and hopes that this means continued changes and growth for Folsom Lake College. She knows how long change takes and was a front-runner in encouraging it.
“Three years ago they started a food service committee of faculty, staff, students and administration. We met and discussed what issues there were, what problems there were and how we could make the food better,” Hodge said. “The committee brought awareness and the thought, ‘Wait a minute, things aren’t good here. We need to change it somehow to make it more exceptional – to make it better.’”
Sims said that the entire Los Rios district of schools is increasing their nutritional efforts.
“This campus is very small, but we are doing as much as anyone else,” Sims said. “And I am looking for ways to increase the healthy options, especially for grab-and-go customers. We want to be really healthy and hope to keep developing that aspect of the cafeteria for Folsom Lake College.”
Valentine Babysitter
Babysitters have a fly-on-the-wall view of the rarely observed part of Valentine’s Day: the end of the date.
“Usually the couples come home way touchier,” said six year veteran babysitter, Lisa Hendricks. “But the couples that leave and were already touchy have the money in their hand when they get home and say ‘Ok leave,’ and run upstairs. I always sit on the couch with my purse on my lap, ready to jump up and leave the minute they get home.”
Hendricks is in a money making industry that escalates around Valentine’s Day and has not seemed to slack with the economy.
“This year I was asked five times to babysit. I get asked months in advance. Everyone jumps on that day. I usually start getting asked in December,” Hendricks said.
Parents usually start looking for sitters sometime in November, according to Mary Schwartz, Director of Public Relations for babysitting super website, Sittercity.com. She said the average rate for babysitter pay is $11.35 to $15.34 around the nation.
“The average babysitter’s rate doesn’t go up for Valentine’s Day, only New Year’s Eve. So technically I guess it is a cost-effective day to go out – babysitting wise,” Schwartz said.
It also might be a better way to generate romance and intimacy than the approximate $900 million American’s spend on chocolate every year.
“Most couples don’t want to plan for intimacy, but they plan for everything else, so why not pencil it in? Sleep is the new sex,” said Marriage and Family Psychologist, Christina Neumeyer. “But the afterglow of intimacy lasts for days. It’s like working out; you feel the effects for a while afterwards and what better day to plan for then Valentine’s Day?”
Hendricks babysat for one Valentine’s couple that gave her a time frame for dinner and shopping when they left. Knowing that stores close around 10 p.m., Hendricks was ready to leave for an hour and a half before the couple returned.
“I was thinking: what were they doing for an hour and a half? When they finally got home the woman was missing her bra and her undershirt and the man’s shirt was half tucked in. They looked at me sheepishly and were like ‘Sorry we are late,’ and the man said something under his breath and the woman hit him and was like ‘Shut up honey!’ It was funny because they both knew I understood what was going on. I had my purse so I just got out of there as fast as possible,” Hendricks said.
Taking that time to be alone and intimate is an important move for every couple, but it should represent a lasting commitment to relationship, not just a once-a-year romance, Neumeyer said.
“The family I babysat for last year they were a little rocky in their marriage. I told them that couples were going to start asking me to babysit in December and I was like, this needs to happen for you, I want to do this for you. I knew they needed that time together. They came home so touchy. It was sweet. And they brought me home a rose,” Hendricks said.
Valentine’s Day will not really change anything about a relationship but it is a beautiful opportunity to re-evaluate the health of a relationship, Neumeyer said.
“In our economy right now it is a luxury to be long and fancy and drawn out, so instead, be creative,” Neumeyer said. “Spending $15 for a babysitter and going to visit the beach is a nice treat. It is short term gain and it feels good.”
Hendricks realizes the importance of date night, and the demand for good babysitters.
“A couple people asked me the day before, ‘What are you doing tomorrow night?’ and then they got so sad when I said I couldn’t babysit because that means they don’t get to do something on Valentine’s day because of me,” Hendricks said.
This also means planning ahead is important.
“They ask in November, ‘Um do you have anyone in your life? Okay then just mark this down on your calendar,’ or on Valentine’s Day they will joke with me and say, ‘Mark us down for next year,’” Hendricks said.
Getting a babysitter for Valentine’s Day is not only beneficial to couples who need romance, but also for children.
“Children benefit from knowing that their mom and dad genuinely like each other,” Neumeyer said. “Couples can show this by just a pat on a shoulder, a kiss when they leave or a simple ‘How was your day?’ They don’t have to be madly in love and over the moon all day long, every day.”
Neumeyer said that Valentine’s Day dates can show children that parents appreciate and love each other but that it should also be a daily commitment for couples.
“One day won’t make or break a relationship but it can begin a new way of interaction,” she said. “It takes a whole lifetime to get this right. Not just one day.”
Valentine’s Day is not only beneficial for these couples and their relationships but for the entertainment of babysitters like Hendricks who make money, play with kids and have funny stories to tell their friends the next day about love and couple-hood.
“There are no bad dates,” Hendricks said, “Not on Valentine’s Day.”
“Usually the couples come home way touchier,” said six year veteran babysitter, Lisa Hendricks. “But the couples that leave and were already touchy have the money in their hand when they get home and say ‘Ok leave,’ and run upstairs. I always sit on the couch with my purse on my lap, ready to jump up and leave the minute they get home.”
Hendricks is in a money making industry that escalates around Valentine’s Day and has not seemed to slack with the economy.
“This year I was asked five times to babysit. I get asked months in advance. Everyone jumps on that day. I usually start getting asked in December,” Hendricks said.
Parents usually start looking for sitters sometime in November, according to Mary Schwartz, Director of Public Relations for babysitting super website, Sittercity.com. She said the average rate for babysitter pay is $11.35 to $15.34 around the nation.
“The average babysitter’s rate doesn’t go up for Valentine’s Day, only New Year’s Eve. So technically I guess it is a cost-effective day to go out – babysitting wise,” Schwartz said.
It also might be a better way to generate romance and intimacy than the approximate $900 million American’s spend on chocolate every year.
“Most couples don’t want to plan for intimacy, but they plan for everything else, so why not pencil it in? Sleep is the new sex,” said Marriage and Family Psychologist, Christina Neumeyer. “But the afterglow of intimacy lasts for days. It’s like working out; you feel the effects for a while afterwards and what better day to plan for then Valentine’s Day?”
Hendricks babysat for one Valentine’s couple that gave her a time frame for dinner and shopping when they left. Knowing that stores close around 10 p.m., Hendricks was ready to leave for an hour and a half before the couple returned.
“I was thinking: what were they doing for an hour and a half? When they finally got home the woman was missing her bra and her undershirt and the man’s shirt was half tucked in. They looked at me sheepishly and were like ‘Sorry we are late,’ and the man said something under his breath and the woman hit him and was like ‘Shut up honey!’ It was funny because they both knew I understood what was going on. I had my purse so I just got out of there as fast as possible,” Hendricks said.
Taking that time to be alone and intimate is an important move for every couple, but it should represent a lasting commitment to relationship, not just a once-a-year romance, Neumeyer said.
“The family I babysat for last year they were a little rocky in their marriage. I told them that couples were going to start asking me to babysit in December and I was like, this needs to happen for you, I want to do this for you. I knew they needed that time together. They came home so touchy. It was sweet. And they brought me home a rose,” Hendricks said.
Valentine’s Day will not really change anything about a relationship but it is a beautiful opportunity to re-evaluate the health of a relationship, Neumeyer said.
“In our economy right now it is a luxury to be long and fancy and drawn out, so instead, be creative,” Neumeyer said. “Spending $15 for a babysitter and going to visit the beach is a nice treat. It is short term gain and it feels good.”
Hendricks realizes the importance of date night, and the demand for good babysitters.
“A couple people asked me the day before, ‘What are you doing tomorrow night?’ and then they got so sad when I said I couldn’t babysit because that means they don’t get to do something on Valentine’s day because of me,” Hendricks said.
This also means planning ahead is important.
“They ask in November, ‘Um do you have anyone in your life? Okay then just mark this down on your calendar,’ or on Valentine’s Day they will joke with me and say, ‘Mark us down for next year,’” Hendricks said.
Getting a babysitter for Valentine’s Day is not only beneficial to couples who need romance, but also for children.
“Children benefit from knowing that their mom and dad genuinely like each other,” Neumeyer said. “Couples can show this by just a pat on a shoulder, a kiss when they leave or a simple ‘How was your day?’ They don’t have to be madly in love and over the moon all day long, every day.”
Neumeyer said that Valentine’s Day dates can show children that parents appreciate and love each other but that it should also be a daily commitment for couples.
“One day won’t make or break a relationship but it can begin a new way of interaction,” she said. “It takes a whole lifetime to get this right. Not just one day.”
Valentine’s Day is not only beneficial for these couples and their relationships but for the entertainment of babysitters like Hendricks who make money, play with kids and have funny stories to tell their friends the next day about love and couple-hood.
“There are no bad dates,” Hendricks said, “Not on Valentine’s Day.”
Sunday, November 28, 2010
A Simple Christmas
Gift-getting really isn’t my thing. I like Christmas, I like presents, but they are not my favorite part of the holidays.
Be alarmed, a girl that totally admits to being into clothes-and-make-up-and-accessories is now admitting that she doesn’t really care about all that . . . crap.
I guess that it comes down to the fact that people spending money on me makes me feel more like a burden than a blessing. And the holidays are about blessings, giving them and remembering them.
Sitting on my couch watching old “Home Alone” movies, and the star on top of the Christmas tree blink on and off, sends me more into a mood of nostalgia than greedy present-grubbying-gift-peeking self-interest. This is the way I like it.
If you took an X-ray of my Christmas stocking I think the truth would be visible. Colorfully wrapped in red and silver would be some tweezers, a box of animal crackers, hairspray, probably an orange and maybe a five dollar gift card to Peet’s Coffee.
The gift-giving tradition I am used to means taking utmost pleasure in the quality of the time spent on each other and not the quantity (or cost) of gifts.
I might even be unhappy if a beautiful MacBook Air was wrapped up and placed under the tree. There is nothing like a computer to steal away the precious time spent with family and the simple joy that comes from not spending over our budget and appreciating each other, not each other’s credit card debt.
But that materialism and commercialism is an aspect of the holiday season. Even Thanksgiving is overshadowed by Black Friday, the annual shopping day where people can go and spend money they don’t have on things they don’t need or on presents that are still out of their budget.
There has got to be more to Christmas than the credit-card hangovers and the fatigue that comes in January.
My stocking, usually filled by my parents, consists of the treats that I love most, and the things I “borrow” on occasion from their room. Practical, maybe. Hilarious? Definitely.
In the spirit of Thanksgiving, I enjoy the gratitude that sweeps over me for that Target shirt or headband from Forever 21 I get from my sisters. This is what Christmas gifts should feel like.
In the spirit of the economy, I feel like this makes more than perfect sense.
Plus think of “Home Alone.” There are so many fun little things that you can try that are much more exciting than shopping. Like setting ropes on fire and building traps and dumping water on someone just for the heck of it.
Christmas should be fun, not hectic and not a burden.
And the nostalgia reminds me of the days of Christmas-past. I have no clue what I got for Christmas in those years. I don’t even remember what I received for Christmas last year and frankly, I don’t care.
Gosh, I’m different.
Think about your neighbor or your friend (so we don’t make this too personal) and how much money they spend on decorations, fancy food, expensive toys, holiday drinking and every other thing that the holidays are known for.
Believe me that “joy” lasts for approximately one day, maybe a week, and then the bill arrives.
But this isn’t really about money. It is about taking pleasure in the little things, in family, in friends, in fireplaces and hot chocolate.
So if you’re thinking about getting me a Christmas gift this year, don’t bother. Making me sugary, starchy cookies and watching “A White Christmas” with me is probably a better idea. I mean, obviously I am not good at receiving presents and I won’t spend a fortune on you.
But a fortune to one man is just bullcrap to another. The best gift you can give is truly the simplest: your love, your time, your energy, yourself.
Christmas is a time for sappy emotions and corny decorations. . .
And maybe some presents.
Be alarmed, a girl that totally admits to being into clothes-and-make-up-and-accessories is now admitting that she doesn’t really care about all that . . . crap.
I guess that it comes down to the fact that people spending money on me makes me feel more like a burden than a blessing. And the holidays are about blessings, giving them and remembering them.
Sitting on my couch watching old “Home Alone” movies, and the star on top of the Christmas tree blink on and off, sends me more into a mood of nostalgia than greedy present-grubbying-gift-peeking self-interest. This is the way I like it.
If you took an X-ray of my Christmas stocking I think the truth would be visible. Colorfully wrapped in red and silver would be some tweezers, a box of animal crackers, hairspray, probably an orange and maybe a five dollar gift card to Peet’s Coffee.
The gift-giving tradition I am used to means taking utmost pleasure in the quality of the time spent on each other and not the quantity (or cost) of gifts.
I might even be unhappy if a beautiful MacBook Air was wrapped up and placed under the tree. There is nothing like a computer to steal away the precious time spent with family and the simple joy that comes from not spending over our budget and appreciating each other, not each other’s credit card debt.
But that materialism and commercialism is an aspect of the holiday season. Even Thanksgiving is overshadowed by Black Friday, the annual shopping day where people can go and spend money they don’t have on things they don’t need or on presents that are still out of their budget.
There has got to be more to Christmas than the credit-card hangovers and the fatigue that comes in January.
My stocking, usually filled by my parents, consists of the treats that I love most, and the things I “borrow” on occasion from their room. Practical, maybe. Hilarious? Definitely.
In the spirit of Thanksgiving, I enjoy the gratitude that sweeps over me for that Target shirt or headband from Forever 21 I get from my sisters. This is what Christmas gifts should feel like.
In the spirit of the economy, I feel like this makes more than perfect sense.
Plus think of “Home Alone.” There are so many fun little things that you can try that are much more exciting than shopping. Like setting ropes on fire and building traps and dumping water on someone just for the heck of it.
Christmas should be fun, not hectic and not a burden.
And the nostalgia reminds me of the days of Christmas-past. I have no clue what I got for Christmas in those years. I don’t even remember what I received for Christmas last year and frankly, I don’t care.
Gosh, I’m different.
Think about your neighbor or your friend (so we don’t make this too personal) and how much money they spend on decorations, fancy food, expensive toys, holiday drinking and every other thing that the holidays are known for.
Believe me that “joy” lasts for approximately one day, maybe a week, and then the bill arrives.
But this isn’t really about money. It is about taking pleasure in the little things, in family, in friends, in fireplaces and hot chocolate.
So if you’re thinking about getting me a Christmas gift this year, don’t bother. Making me sugary, starchy cookies and watching “A White Christmas” with me is probably a better idea. I mean, obviously I am not good at receiving presents and I won’t spend a fortune on you.
But a fortune to one man is just bullcrap to another. The best gift you can give is truly the simplest: your love, your time, your energy, yourself.
Christmas is a time for sappy emotions and corny decorations. . .
And maybe some presents.
Monday, November 22, 2010
Simply, My Life
Let me tell you a story about decorations, menu-planning, slaving in the kitchen, carbs, too many potatoes, not enough potatoes, exhaustion, laughter and singing: Thanksgiving with the Ostermanns.
Life is family.
And it’s these simple things that mean the most, especially during the complicated holiday season, often overshadowed by merchandise and materialism.
So, Instead of a Christmas list, I made a what-I-love-about-my-life-list that goes something like this:
1. Jesus
2. Mummy and Dadders
3. My three sisters: Elise, Ariel and Kali
4. My three best friends: Kaley, Lauryn and Kate
5. Playing outside (mud pits, climbing trees and puddle-jumping)
6. My heater (just installed in my room, boo-yah)
7. Organic agave nectar
8. Frisbee
9. Singing at the top of my lungs
10. Dorky dancing
You have to hear the story to understand.
Once upon a time, two people married each other because they were ridiculously in love. When they felt they were ready for a new adventure, they had four daughters. Being good parents, they loved each other best and their daughters next best.
As a good father, my Dad taught all his daughters the essential skills of life: throwing a Frisbee and climbing trees. As a good mother, my Mom taught us how to make the best sweet potato casserole and how to eat healthy. As good sisters to each other, we were never without someone to hug, blame, borrow from, fight with, harmonize to or use for a dance partner.
Childhood was spent primarily outdoors, racing the neighborhood boys and singing in the rain. Winter was full of make-believe and dress-up and learning new dance moves from one of my mom’s Denise Richards exercise videos.
My teen days were spent actually learning how to sing, ruining expensive shoes by forgetting that muddy puddles were not created for jumping, and loving Jesus. College years began with learning how to wear make-up.
These years were shaped by my best girl friends and will end with them; I am going to live with one, I drove off the road when another one called me five minutes after her engagement and I still cry when I think about how Oklahoma is stealing another one away.
Life is full of change.
Now I give myself over to things like organic agave nectar. As a habitual treat-lover, sugar has always been something of a problem. After a life of high fiber cereal and an allotted hour a day where I “had” to play outside, I’ve lived a rather healthy life pattern. Now, as an adult, I stay in charge of making my own food and gym schedule. Shopping for low calorie and nutritious foods has become a hobby. My sisters and I are the first to swear by P90X and the last to admit that carob really is not as good as chocolate.
Life is full of adventure.
Although I am in the process of moving out, I enjoy the room my parents have willingly provided, and the heater they donated to me. Perhaps I have a poor constitution or perhaps a year in Los Angeles ruined me but I swear there is never such a thing as too many blankets. I have my methods for solving these problems, nothing like sneaking into my sister’s room at an unholy hour of the night and literally stealing the blankets off of her.
Life is funny.
The thing about this Thanksgiving is that I am older. I understand how many blessings are in my life. I understand exactly who I want to thank for them. Most importantly I do not want a single second to pass that I don’t treasure. Something about my family is simply amazing. And there is nothing like great food to remind us.
P.S. There will definitely be a dorky dance party to follow, complete with an air guitar contest and shooting a ridiculous home video in which we will all get drunk on sparkling cider.
I love life.
Life is family.
And it’s these simple things that mean the most, especially during the complicated holiday season, often overshadowed by merchandise and materialism.
So, Instead of a Christmas list, I made a what-I-love-about-my-life-list that goes something like this:
1. Jesus
2. Mummy and Dadders
3. My three sisters: Elise, Ariel and Kali
4. My three best friends: Kaley, Lauryn and Kate
5. Playing outside (mud pits, climbing trees and puddle-jumping)
6. My heater (just installed in my room, boo-yah)
7. Organic agave nectar
8. Frisbee
9. Singing at the top of my lungs
10. Dorky dancing
You have to hear the story to understand.
Once upon a time, two people married each other because they were ridiculously in love. When they felt they were ready for a new adventure, they had four daughters. Being good parents, they loved each other best and their daughters next best.
As a good father, my Dad taught all his daughters the essential skills of life: throwing a Frisbee and climbing trees. As a good mother, my Mom taught us how to make the best sweet potato casserole and how to eat healthy. As good sisters to each other, we were never without someone to hug, blame, borrow from, fight with, harmonize to or use for a dance partner.
Childhood was spent primarily outdoors, racing the neighborhood boys and singing in the rain. Winter was full of make-believe and dress-up and learning new dance moves from one of my mom’s Denise Richards exercise videos.
My teen days were spent actually learning how to sing, ruining expensive shoes by forgetting that muddy puddles were not created for jumping, and loving Jesus. College years began with learning how to wear make-up.
These years were shaped by my best girl friends and will end with them; I am going to live with one, I drove off the road when another one called me five minutes after her engagement and I still cry when I think about how Oklahoma is stealing another one away.
Life is full of change.
Now I give myself over to things like organic agave nectar. As a habitual treat-lover, sugar has always been something of a problem. After a life of high fiber cereal and an allotted hour a day where I “had” to play outside, I’ve lived a rather healthy life pattern. Now, as an adult, I stay in charge of making my own food and gym schedule. Shopping for low calorie and nutritious foods has become a hobby. My sisters and I are the first to swear by P90X and the last to admit that carob really is not as good as chocolate.
Life is full of adventure.
Although I am in the process of moving out, I enjoy the room my parents have willingly provided, and the heater they donated to me. Perhaps I have a poor constitution or perhaps a year in Los Angeles ruined me but I swear there is never such a thing as too many blankets. I have my methods for solving these problems, nothing like sneaking into my sister’s room at an unholy hour of the night and literally stealing the blankets off of her.
Life is funny.
The thing about this Thanksgiving is that I am older. I understand how many blessings are in my life. I understand exactly who I want to thank for them. Most importantly I do not want a single second to pass that I don’t treasure. Something about my family is simply amazing. And there is nothing like great food to remind us.
P.S. There will definitely be a dorky dance party to follow, complete with an air guitar contest and shooting a ridiculous home video in which we will all get drunk on sparkling cider.
I love life.
Monday, November 15, 2010
Death On His Own Terms
There is something charming, chilling and absolutely fascinating about a brilliant bloodstain analyst that moonlights as a serial killer.
Dexter Morgan kills by the guidelines of Harry, his adoptive father, who trained Dexter to convincingly interact with normal human beings while remaining a closeted psychopath. Dexter’s fascination with killing has largely escaped suspicion as Dexter keeps up superficially close relationships with his sister, Deb, and girlfriend, Rita. However, Dexter is also alarmingly aware of his duplicitous lifestyle and how he is unable to feel the emotions of love, friendliness or sorrow, although he has completely mastered the art of pretending.
Serial killers are a familiar figure in action movies by this time, usually as the villain. Yet empathizing with a serial killer is not something I expected. Neither did I expect to have conversations with my friends about feeling fascinated by the methodical process of killing or feeling like we could relate to Dexter’s search for emotion.
Dexter’s signature killing method is shown in nearly every episode. In just the first episode of the first season we see that he straps his victim naked to a table and slices open their cheek with a knife for the blood he will later store on a slide as a sort of victory treasure. As the captive blubbers and their eyes go white with terror, he delivers the death blow which can be anything from a cleaver to a buzzing drill. Nauseating as it may sound; it becomes fascinating as you feel more involved in Dexter’s emotions than in those of the dying yet monstrous victim. Plus, you are spared the actual sawing or gutting, although you are shown the wrapped limbs that he dumps into the Florida Keys.
Something about this is both desensitizing and arousing. A violent look at the transition we have as a culture into less human forms of empathy.
But, of course, this is only in season one. Now on season four, Dexter has become much more graphic and the villain of the season kills with much more methodical ferociousness.
“This season just hits closer to home,” said Bryan Graf, “The way in which one of the serial killers thinks about the death and just by being friendly manages to find out so much about their victim. Its just so graphic but you can’t stop watching.”
The thing about this Showtime production is that you cannot help but become fascinated. It becomes a brilliant battle of wits with death as the punishment for failure. Watching Dexter manipulate his emotions and those around him, slyly figure out how to kill the devils that the Miami Metro Police Department he works for tracks down and still remain a serial killer that no one is on the hunt for sounds unbelievable until you watch the show. Suddenly, in a grotesque way, Dexter becomes believable.
This sadistic superhero does not kill just for the fun of it but according to the “Code of Harry” he must only kill those who deserve to die.
The self- narrated setting of this beautifully shot show is proactive and eluding and the actor who plays Dexter, Michael C. Hall, seems the perfect platform for his ambiguous persona. Hall won the Golden Globe award in 2010 for best actor in a television drama series after two other nominations from previous seasons.
The show is something of a mix between the depth of Lost and the superhero-gone-good feeling of Twilight. Throw away your vampires and your werewolves to delve into the dark and good-looking person of Dexter, the forensic researcher that you know could outsmart you.
He is too smart, even watching you begin to understand that Dexter truly believes that he is an incurable psychopath striving to exist and evolve on his own terms.
And also live by Harry’s Code’s first rule: Don’t get caught.
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